How to Make a Decision about Anything..........

Are you the type who deliberates for days, weeks, months, even years over decisions?  You can call it procrastination, hesitation, fear of the unknown.  Whatever you wish to call it, it's preventing you from accomplishing what you need to do, want to do, affecting your life in a big or small way, and always hanging over you. You inability to make a decision could be holding someone else back from making one of their own. 

I am guilty of this at times.  Years ago I had the most incredible job offer.  It came out of nowhere and it was too good to refuse. Or was it? I was very comfortable in my current office. It was close to home, I got along well with all my co-workers, the salary was good, I had the freedom to come and go as I pleased.  On the flip-side, I had basically reached the top and there was no higher position or income I could strive for.  I scheduled an interview at the other location and was hired on the spot.  All I needed to do was accept the position and report to work.  I loved the job, I loved the office, I was crazy about the location (right in the heart of mid-town), the salary, bonuses, and the health and retirement benefits were more than I could ever dream of.  It was the perfect offer and I was thrilled, honored, and terrified.  It took me an entire month to make a decision! When I finally accepted the offer, I still needed to give my current employer two week's notice.  I am very fortunate the new company wanted me so badly and  was willing to wait.

I am in a similar situation now but it's not a job issue this time.  It's more of a "should I stay or should I go" type of thing.  I have a friend, a close friend.  We have our ups and downs.  Right now, it's mostly downs, as down as it can get sometimes.  It wasn't always like this. It used to be great.  The perfect give and take relationship.  There are certain obstacles and situations making it difficult right now.  I am hoping those situations will change and everything can go back to the way it was.  There are no guarantees that it ever will.  I am afraid it might get even worse! I am waiting for things to improve but in the meantime I am empty, stressed, frustrated, discouraged, and disappointed.  Not all the time--but MOST of the time.

I see a therapist and the subject of my troubled friendship always comes up in our sessions.  I told him yesterday that I am tired of whining and complaining about the same thing over and over.  I am sick of the sound of my own words as they come out of my mouth.  I need to make a decision and I can't waste anymore time. I don't have that much time to waste. I am 48 years old, for God's sake! By some strange miracle, we shifted the conversation to another topic-an even more difficult one but at least I wasn't whining about the other thing! I know what it is I need to do and I am not doing it. I need to make a list.  This is what I have always done when it comes to decision-making in my life.  I write a good old Pros and Cons List!

Do you have a decision you need to make and you keep going back and forth on it?  It can be about anything--from leaving your job, to purchasing a home, staying in a marriage,  buying a new washer and dryer, going out on a blind-date, to ending a friendship.  Write a list.

Take a sheet of paper and draw a line right down the center.  At the top of one column write PROS. Here you will write down everything that is good or will be good. The other column will be your list of CONS--things that are bad, will be bad or could be bad.  Take some time to think and keep adding to your list until you're finished. Don't ask for any help with this list.  These things must come from your heart and you don't want anyone else to influence you.  It has to be your decision or you will never be happy with it.  Add up each column. Then make your decision based on the amount pros or cons on your list. 

I find this to be a very effective way to get a clear and honest picture of things in my life.  I hope it helps you, as well. And now.....I have a list to make............

And this is my Daily Cyn..........

                                                    





Kale--the Perfect Leafy Green...........

Kale is my favorite vegetable! It's a gorgeous, leafy green and chock full of vitamins and minerals. In fact, it is so good looking that many restaurants and buffets use kale for decorative purposes. A few years ago I went on a cruise and big serving bowls of food rested on beds of kale! I asked the chef to reserve a portion every evening and lightly steam it for me at dinner. He reluctantly did as I asked but couldn't believe I wanted to eat a "decoration"! Why wouldn't I? Kale is delicious and one of the healthiest foods around. It's full of vitamins A, C and K, and it is a great source of manganese, calcium and iron. It has no cholesterol and offers a nice serving of fiber and protein.


If you have never tried kale, here are two of my favorite recipes to try. The kale in these recipes is roasted....a great way to bring out the flavor in this tasty veggie. Enjoy!!

Roasted Kale with Sea Salt

•4 cups firmly-packed kale

•1 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil

•1 tsp. good-quality sea salt

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Wash and trim the kale: Peel off the tough stems by folding the kale leaves in half like a book and stripping the stems off. Toss with extra virgin olive oil. Roast for five minutes. Turn kale over. Roast another 7 to 10 minutes until kale turns brown and becomes paper thin and brittle. Remove from oven and sprinkle with sea salt. Serve immediately.

Makes 2 servings.

Per serving: 186 calories, 14 g fat (2 g saturated fat), 0 mg cholesterol, 13 g carbohydrate, 3 g fiber, 4 g protein, 412% vitamin A, 268% vitamin C, 18% calcium, 13% iron

Beet-Kale Salad Recipe (serves 4 as a main dish, or 6 as a side)

•6 large beets, chopped into bite-size pieces

•6 kale leaves, roughly chopped

•I garlic bulb

•1/2 cup olive oil

•1/4 cup balsamic vinegar

•feta cheese

•1/2 cup walnuts

•course salt

•pepper

Assemble The Salad

•Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

•Toss beets with olive oil, pepper and coarse salt in a baking dish

•Cut tips off garlic bulb and lay it flat in the midst of the beets

•Cook for 45 minutes

•Add walnuts and kale

•Cook for another five minutes

•Let cook for 10 minutes

•Move salad to a bowl and toss with vinegar and crumbled feta

•Enjoy at room temperature, or cold

Mix it Up

Every recipe is made to be messed with. Try replacing the kale with different green vegetable, like green beans, broccoli or spinach. Replace the walnuts with pecans or pine nuts. Use goat's cheese instead of feta, or try lemon juice instead of vinegar. Cooking the nuts with the vegetable does a fairly good job of toasting them, but If you want them even tastier, try toasting them in a frying pan or in the oven, alone, before adding them to the salad.

And this is my Daily Cyn......

I am Afraid:


You say that you love rain,

but you open your umbrella when it rains...

You say that you love the sun,

but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines...

You say that you love the wind,

But you close your windows when wind blows...

This is why I am afraid;

You say that you love me too...

- William Shakespeare

Actions always speak louder than words............
My dad always said, "Watch and learn."
You can tell an awful lot about a person by merely observing their actions. 
Words can be beautiful.  When we hear the words " I love you" from another person-- life is wonderful.  But words are just words without action.  If they hurt you, mistreat you and do not have your best interests at heart, they do not love you.  Watch and learn...........

And this is my Daily Cyn............

Stay........

When someone you care about has their hopes and dreams shattered, what do you do? You might even think they are to blame for their problems.  Perhaps they self-sabotaged something great that came their way.  They failed to plan or prepare and told you they had it all under control.   They refused to listen to your advice and your suggestions and now, even though you hoped and wished for the best despite everything, they failed again. 

It's so easy to say, " I told you so."  You know they should have listened to you.  They know they should have listened to you.  There is no need to remind them of this--EVER.  They fact that they already KNOW you were right makes it worse. 

So what do you do? They are now hopeless, distraught, they want to give up.  Do you write them off and walk away? They might even tell you to go, leave, get away.  Don't listen. Stay. 

We all make mistakes.  We all fail.  We all have hopes and dreams and anticipate good things.  We hear of a great offer and we are excited, we get our hopes up, we begin making plans.  Then something happens--something bad.  Beyond our control or not; the plan fails.  Even when we have no one else to blame but ourselves, there is nothing worse than being alone when we already feel we have lost everything. 

Stay.  Remain close and within reach.  Give them space and allow them to sulk, lick their wounds, or rant and rave  As long as they are not abusing or hurting you--stay.  They will come around  eventually and realize things are never hopeless.  No matter how angry and disappointed you are--Stay.  When they are ready, hold them close and reassure them that you are with them, fighting with them and for them.  Sometimes all we need is to hear that someone believes in us no matter how awful things appear.  When you are torn between going or staying..... Stay. 

And this is my Daily Cyn...........

Take a Walk...........

I spent a few hours today on an unfamiliar site writing an article.  A new company saw some of my previous work and invited me to come and write for them.  It's so exciting to know there are those out there not only reading what I write but actually enjoying it and find my little tid-bits of advice worthy of compensation. It makes all those late-night hours hunched over my computer, the time spent researching, and the sacrifices I make in order to get my writing done so worthwhile. 

I packed up my laptop and went to the new office where I knew I could get some work done in peace and quiet.  There would be no ringing telephones, no interuptions, and no cat continuously walking across my keyboard hoping for attention.  I put on a pot of coffee and began typing away. 

The words began to flow immediately.  I finished the article, uploaded a beautiful image, attached some links to my own personal wholesome food recipes, and decided to preview my handiwork.  I read it and re-read it and decided this was my best writing yet.  I closed the preview section of the new site and when I did, my article disappeared.  In a flash it was lost.  I couldn't believe it! My magnificent writing--GONE!  I tried to relocate it, called tech support for assistance, cried, begged and pleaded but nothing could be done.  I never hit the SAVE DRAFT button and my masterpiece was lost forever.  I cannot even begin to explain my level of frustration.  All that work--down the drain--literally!

I could start again but I didn't know how.  Could I actually remember every word I had just written and make it just as good?  I never keep rough drafts of anything (perhaps I should from now on) so it was basically straight from my heart onto my computer screen.  I sat there for the longest time but the words just would not come.  I was too upset to write. I needed to clear my head, get rid of this anger, and just step back for awhile.  I decided to take a walk.

It's a bit overcast outside today but the temperature is still warm.  I took a mile walk down the street to a little group of stores.  I bought a salad and a bottle of  the most delicious Organic Sparkling Pomegranate Water I have ever tasted.  As I walked I saw leaves already beginning to change color.  It made me excited for fall to arrive so I could make plans to pick apples, bake pies, carve pumpkins and go hiking through the nature preserve with friends. I also noticed that directly across from my office is a big patch of empty grass.  I never notice it before! How nice it would be to get a group of people there to do some yoga or some other kind of outside activity. They could come back to my office to enjoy some homemade soup while I teach a seminar or lead them in a journaling session. I could even light a fire in the fireplace to enhance the atmosphere.  This is such a peaceful place of healing.  Once people know about this place, they will want to be here all the time.

I am back from my walk and sitting in front of the laptop again.  I am full of new ideas, possibilities, and hope for the future of my business.  My business is helping others and in doing so, I am helping myself. As they heal and become whole, I heal and become whole.  It's beautiful how life works that way.

I am thankful I lost my article.  I was forced to step away for awhile to clear my mind. I got to take a walk.  I explored my surroundings.  I saw things I never saw before.  I have new ideas to help others and to help my business grow.  As I sit here sipping my Sparkling Pomegranate Water, the words are beginning to flow again.  I am filled to overflowing.  If I am empty again, I will just take another walk............

And this is my Daily Cyn............

Sweet Potato Soup with Curried Apples

Nothing is better for the soul than a good bowl of soup..... here is a recipe that is hearty, healthy and unique! Enjoy!

2 1/2 pounds sweet potatoes (3 or 4)

2 tablespoons olive oil

1 medium onion, halved and sliced

Coarse salt and ground black pepper

1 red bell pepper, ribs and seeds removed, thinly sliced

2 jalapeno peppers, ribs and seeds removed, thinly sliced

3 garlic cloves, coarsely chopped

1/2 cup dry sherry (optional)

4 cups vegetable broth, homemade or canned

2 teaspoons white-wine vinegar

1 teaspoon honey

1/4 teaspoon curry powder

1 small tart apple (4 ounce) peeled, cored, and diced

1/4 cup plain yogurt

2 tablespoons chopped mint, for garnish

Directions

1.Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place sweet potatoes on a baking sheet and roast for 1 hour, turning once, or until potatoes are very soft. When cool enough to handle, scoop cooked potato out of the skins. Discard skins.

2.Meanwhile, in a 5-quart Dutch oven or large soup pot, heat oil over medium. Add onion, season with salt and pepper, and cook, stirring occasionally, until soft and caramelized, about 20 minutes. Add bell pepper, jalapenos, and garlic; cook for 5 minutes. Add sherry (if using), sweet potato, and broth; stir to combine. Bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer, and cook for 20 minutes, until flavors have blended.

3.Working in batches, puree soup in a blender. Combine batches in a clean pot. The soup should be thick. (If you prefer a thinner soup, add water or a little more broth.) Taste and adjust seasoning.

4.In a small saucepan over medium heat, bring vinegar, honey, and curry powder to a boil. Add apple; stir for 1 minute and remove from heat. To serve, ladle the soup into warm bowls, add a spoonful of apples, a spoonful of yogurt, and a sprinkle of mint.

Serves 4 (makes 6 cups)


And this is my Daily Cyn........

Two Wholesome Autumn Foods

With fall just around the corner, why not try these two great recipes?  They are healthy, warming, and guilt-free. 

Soup is perfect to warm your soul after a day of raking leaves or pumpkin picking or to have just when want something soothing and satisfying.  The ginger in this soup provides instant heat! Serve this soup with a large tossed salad and hot crusty whole-grain bread and you have the perfect lunch or light supper.  Sprinkle toasted pumpkin seeds on top before serving to make it more interesting.....

Carrot and Ginger Soup

Ingredients:
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon allspice
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1 tablespoon maple syrup
1/2 teaspoon olive oil
3 1/2 cups peeled and diced organic carrots
1/2 cup chopped onion
1 teaspoon minced fresh garlic
1 2/2 teaspoon fresh mince ginger
4 cups water
1 cup orange juice

Directions:
1.  Heat a large stock pot over medium heat. Add olive oil.
2.  Saute carrots, onions, garlic, and ginger in oil for five minutes of until vegetables just begin to turn brown
3.  Add water and orange juice
4.  Bring to a biol and simmer for 30 minutes or until veggies are soft
5.  Puree the soup in a blender or with an immersion blender
6.  Add the spices and maple syrup.  Add a bit of water if soup is too thick but do not make it too thin.
7.  Serve hot
Enjoy!

Stuffed, Baked Acorn Squash

This is my absolute favorite recipe for the fall.  It's simple, easy, yet impressive enough to serve to guests. Acorn squash is beautiful orange and green on the outside and orange on the inside.  Think of all the beta-carotene you are getting when you eat this squash.  Look for medium size squash that is more orange than green.  Too green means it is not ripe enough and will take longer to cook.  This recipe serves 2 people (one half each).  The rice and bean stuffing makes this meal a complete protein.  This means you do not need to serve meat along with it.  If you really feel like something is missing from your plate, include grilled or baked boneless, skinless chicken breasts. Serve with steamed green vegetables like spinach, kale, or broccoli.

Ingredients:
1 medium acorn squash, scrubbed well
1 cup of cooked brown rice
2 tablespoons cooked black beans
1 tablespoon of raisins
1 tablespoon of chopped walnuts
cinnamon
good quality organic maple syrup

Directions:
1.  Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2.  Acorn squash in half and scoop out seeds.  If squash is difficult to cut, microwave it for about 3 minutes to soften slightly.
3.  Mix raisins and walnuts with the brown rice and stuff each acorn half with 1/2 cup of the mixture.
4.   Sprinkle acorn flesh lightly with the cinnamon.
5.   Place squash in a baking dish (stuffed side up)
5.  Add a bit water to the bottom of the baking dish so the squash does not burn. Check water level occasionally as squash bakes and add more if necessary.
6.  Bake for about 30 minutes or until squash is tender. 
7.  Drizzle lightly with maple syrup and return to oven for another five minutes.
8.  Serve hot

Enjoy