Thursday, August 4, 2011
Did You Wind Up With a Boring, Miserable Life?
If you wind up with a boring, miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest or some guy on TV telling you what to do, then YOU DESERVE IT...... -Frank Zappa
Okay. That quote might be a bit harsh, but it is kinda true! I am not here to slap you around or make you feel badly about yourself. I promise, I have something good to say. Keep reading............
Everyone offers advice. Folks with good intentions always try to point us in the right direction. That's all well and fine. We should seek the counsel of wise people- those with a bit more experience under their belt.
There are times I think I should have listened to my father when I was younger, but I didn't. He wanted me to go to college, study Theology, fall in love with a minister and live happily ever after. Instead, I side-stepped school, landed a great job and married a musician! I eventually did go to college. I was thirty-five years old. I juggled school, studying, exams, a full-time job, a child, a demanding husband, shopping, cooking, cleaning. It wasn't easy but I was determined and I did it. It certainly would have been a whole lot easier if I had done it straight out of high school- Dad's way!
However, I try to look at this way. Who knows where I would be now if I listened to Dad? Perhaps I would be stuck in a career I despise. I wouldn't have married the man I did. My marriage didn't last but I have a beautiful, wonderful son as a result of that union. If I married someone else, I would have a different kid! I love my boy, exactly as he is. He is who he is because of my ex-husband and me.
If I had listened to my dad, I wouldn't have a career in healing and nutrition. I probably wouldn't have met the people who inspired my interest in those fields to begin with. And I know for a fact, I NEVER would've explored alternative methods of healing or spirituality. Most likely I would be a missionary or a minister's wife somewhere. Maybe I would be happy. Maybe not. I don't believe that was ever the plan for me. That was my father's plan and dream for me. Everyone I knew believed that was the life for me. Deep inside, I always had a longing for something different. If I continued to ignore those longings and did what everyone else told me I should do, I would probably be so miserable now. I have disappointed many with my life choices, and I definitely took the hard road now and then, but I have peace. I wouldn't trade that for anything.
I am far from miserable. My life is anything but boring. It is wonderful, exciting and full. Every day I meet new and interesting people. I have the privilege of helping others achieve their hopes, dreams and goals. I have a good life and it gets better every day! The unique talents and gifts that other people recognized in me when I was younger- I am still using them. I would never want to waste what God gave me. I just refuse to allow anyone to squeeze me into one of their molds. I found one on my own that is the perfect fit.
Your life is yours! Live it. Ask for advice from others but ultimately, the decision needs to be yours and yours alone. It took me years to get to the place I am now. I probably did it the hard way but I would never trade my experiences, the wonderful people I've met, or the life lessons I've learned along the way. They make me who I am and although there is always room for improvement, I like who I am.
The good news is: you always have an opportunity to change your life. You can decide today to go in a totally different direction. As long as you are alive, you can do anything you want! It's never too late.
The thing about people is: most of them mean well. My dad loves me and he had a vision for the perfect life for his daughter. But it's not what I wanted. I am happy to say, although he made suggestions and sometimes even tried discourage me, eventually I had his support in all the choices I made for my life- the good and the bad ones. If you allow someone to discourage you enough to abandon your hopes, goals and dreams and you do it their way instead, you will be bored and miserable. And yes, you deserve it! Sorry......
If you are miserable and bored with your life- mix up a little. Shift things around. Try something new. And if the road you are on now is what someone else chose for you and you are unhappy- forgive them for steering you in the wrong direction (and forgive yourself for listening) and then.....simply change lanes!
And this is my Daily Cyn......